FUCK!

I fucking hate feeling like I am missing out on different aspects of life.  As my above post states it’s all about relationships.  I have many good friends out there but, really only one knows about this place.  This is my public diary that anyone can read but, noone knows it’s here.  So I have recently started dating again and it seems that many people have their ideas about who I should date and how it should go.  I just wish I could go back 10 years and keep the one I had.  I know she wasn’t the one at the time but, if I wasn’t so messed up in the head and broke as shit it might of turned out differently.  I see her now and think I probably made a mistake on that one.  I am sure she knows it but, she is married now so that is out of the question.  I just need to think that their is someone out there that could break me out of this funk.  I can get laid but, that shit is just a release and not much fun anymore.  I have fucked my fair share of women out there.  Not as many as some but, more than others.  Really though all I ever wanted is one that would be there when I came home at night and be there when I woke up.  This seems to be less and less likely the more time passes.  Hopefully I will find peace of mind at a later date about this but, until then I will try and contain the crappy feelings roaring through me currently.  There has to be a way to control them and I will find it with time.  Until then I bid you adieu.

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About batmaninhiding

I am just a regular person with random things to chat about.
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One Response to FUCK!

  1. atwittsend81 says:

    its funny how people think that there is a clock for this kinda shit. when i spent all my time in self help forums I watched people from age 18 to age 80 go through the most heinous shit of all time and come out on the other end. those people found other people to be with. even when they didnt have any experience in functional relationships at all. you are a rockstar man. you bring a lot of good stuff to the table and will find a lady that compliments your style and you will both be awesome together. just keep an eye out!

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